Author: alohawild

I have waited a long time for this day to arrive. Mostly, it went according to plan, and everyone thought it was a great party and remembrance. It was a good day.

I was tired, so I wrote the blog on Sunday morning. I was tired, so I went to bed early and woke up early. I am incapable of sleeping in on most days—there is just so much to do. I finally started at about 6:30, rolling over a few times before that at the dread time of 5:30. Yes, the time change is still not completely accepted.

Returning to Saturday, I rose at 7AM with some anxiety–today was the day, as I said, I had waited months to reach Susie’s Concert. I started on the blog and wrote about Friday. I made coffee, liberal coffee from Equal Exchange, in my French Press. After locating walnut pieces and brown sugar to add to the final product, I cooked steel-cut oats in a pan. The ants are back in the pantry, so I added more ant-poison sugar liquid to a paper plate to feed them again. Sometimes, the ants come back, and you must redo the process to make them disappear.

I wrote a somewhat confused account as my emotions were complex. Time slowed for me as I planned to be at First United Methodist Church in Beaverton after 2PM. I dressed in casual clothing and drove north to some food joints. I was there about 11:30 and too early for Standford’s on a Saturday, so I picked Red Robin.

Today, I needed something that would not make me sick and would provide enough calories to get through this. So a burger and fries with an iced tea seemed the best fit. I was thinking about the concert, and my eyes were filled with tears. The waiter was concerned there was something wrong with the food, which was kind of funny. “No, all is good,” I said, or words to that effect.

I drove back from Red Robin, reading a bit on my Kindle as time seemed to slow today while eating extra fries delivered without request. They are soooo good. I usually have chili or a salad–no fries.

I assembled my suit with the suspenders to keep the pants on. My weight loss has the side effect of making all my pants fall off. I won’t update my garments until I reach my next goal of 240. I have reached 248 so far. I will try not to play gourmet chef this spring break, which is my bad habit when I have more time, but to get more exercise instead. I might bake some scones for the mornings, but I will try to avoid delicious pasta and cheese dishes. I will try to resist. I have stopped looking at the cooking section of the NY Times; resist.

This time, it is the black suit I dawn with a 1980s tie Susie would remember buying in Maryland at some mall in the now long-gone Structure stores. No pocket watch, just the tie and a grey shirt to not contrast too much with the black. When I bought suits last year, I selected black (plus grey and blue) as I knew this day would come someday. Sadly, I got to wear the black suit for another good friend’s funeral first, Cory’s, who passed just a few days before Susie.

Air Volvo was overflowing with boxes and items for the concert. I was there after 2PM in my suit (which meant my pants would stay on besides looking the part of the widower) and unloaded. Jeane helped me move the communion table and dress it up. Jeane then pinned some of the items to represent Susie (instead of her ashes), including her favorite hats, slippers, favorite Nikes, glasses, and her new ice skates. It looked great.

Shawn had 700+ pictures and movies playing on the dual projectors in the sanctuary. Barb C was correct; this added more to the service. Excellent.

I had two long tables, and I got help arranging items from Susie’s life on them. I wanted it to look more like a retirement party than a funeral. Everyone helped scatter the items. Later, Michelle V found Susie’s grading sheets from 1970 and read them to folks. The display was well received.

The Windows laptop computer I brought to play the video of Susie’s skating program in 1980 was bricked. For those not up on their computer speak, it would not start–as useful as a brick. I had to play Susie’s ice skating on the Apple I bought for emergencies. I forgot to check the Windows machine this morning.

I had no sign-in book for folks or ushers—I did not want them. It was more of a concert experience than a funeral. I found myself having something to do: greeting people and sometimes seating them. This was good; I got to see everyone and was the only person who knew everyone. It was quite a mixed crowd of Nike, skating, church, and gaming folks. I did not get a count, likely less than 100.

We started five minutes late; I sat with Mariah near the front to thank folks during the service. Rev. Anne Weld-Marten got us going and was surprisingly brief. She introduced Jack, who sang an excellent version of Goin’ Home with Ashley accompanying him on the piano. Thanks to you both!

Soon, John played a mix of songs that flowed into the next one without stopping. John Nilsen always surprises me with the number of notes he gets from the grand piano in the sanctuary. John, playing and smiling as he found new things and brought them together while he played, found The Beatles, Beethoven’s 9th (an Easter hymn for Methodists: 89. Joyful, Joyful, We Adore Thee), and his own music while playing fast and loud (my request). John said a few words and played another piece from his own writing. Thank you, John! See you in Michigan soon (18 May at Grace United Methodist at 2PM, Lansing). Susie would have loved the concert.

Rev. Steve Wolff-Lynn followed—he had come out of retirement to help. Steve recalled a few of his experiences with Susie, including how she took him to every bar in Beaverton to sample the local gin and tonics. Susie was head of personnel at the church for Steve’s first years there. Rev. Steve then said the words to send Susie off from the Methodist Book of Worship. We then broke and headed out.

As usual, some folks left, but a good number followed me; I had to lead to Wesley Hall, and there, the church had prepared no-bake cookies and grilled cheese sandwiches–Susie’s favorites. There was Methodist Punch (Fresca and lime sherbert) and coffee. Folks stayed until almost 6PM; the Nike folks love a good party. I bought a set of John’s sheet music, he signed it, and I commended it to the music department at the church.

It was an excellent party.

When the last guest left, I got help packing up and soon was headed out. The usual Methodist crew was cleaning up. The church did a fantastic job providing cookies, tables, and a friendly face for all our visitors. It was a good concert and felt more like a retirement party than a goodbye.

Air Volvo found its way back to the Volvo Cave. I carefully hung up my suit, and as usual, the pants fell off the hanger (why is it always like this?). A few minutes later, I found them at the bottom of the closet and put them on their own hanger. I headed out and watched the dreadfully boring Ghost Busters movie that just came out. It is a sin to make a dull movie. Apparently, word was out; there were few of us at the showing. The popcorn was good, and the middle of the film was good. I got my kid-sized water, as anything more significant means this diabetic will not make it to the movie’s end.

After returning, I was worn out and went to bed early. I was happy the concert worked and felt the weight and grief lift slightly.

Thanks to everyone who made the concert work, everyone who came, and those who thought about us on Saturday. See you in Michigan in May.

Thanks for reading!

It is a misty Saturday morning when I write this. I managed to sleep until 6:30 and rise with my 7:00 alarm. Yesterday, I was exhausted from preparing for Susie’s Concert today and attending a funeral for a friend. My emotions were all confused, and the day was hard on me.

Starting with the waking, I slept the night, woke at 6:30, and rushed to find my slippers and robe, prove hydration, and make coffee. My first Zoom meeting of a work-from-home Friday (Nike has required attendance in offices on Monday-Thursday) was at 7:00. This is the weekly staff meeting for our team and was run by my newly minted boss, Rajani. The meeting filled the hour, and I finished a banana with the liberal coffee made in my French Press.

The morning was short, and I attended more Zoom meetings on status and change control. Next, I dressed in a dress shirt and tie with a sweater over that. I boarded Air Volvo and headed to the area near my building, Swift, at Nike WHQ. I stopped by Fred Myers and purchased two sympathy cards. I signed one. Scott met me after 11 at Swift parking lot, and I boarded his jeep. I gave him a card to sign, and we headed to the funeral.

I had an early lunch of chicken nuggets at McDonald’s. It was something I could easily eat in Air Volvo and not get on my shirt. It was OK, and the upset tummy settled.

It is not my place to tell the story of another family and their loss. My emotions rose for Susie’s Concert the next day and for the family and their loss. Scott and I left after the service. Scott, following NAV, returned to the Swift Parking lot. After boarding Air Volvo, I returned to the Volvo Cave.

Aside: My colon was not happy with the morning, and I did struggle a bit during the funeral. I nearly ran to the bathroom but managed to resist. This, too, made it an exhausting day.

There were a few meetings left. The project was going on hiatus for a week after today and was wrapping up. It was a quiet day, the usual for Fridays.

I needed some frames for pictures, so I headed to Beaverton in Air Volvo and the Blick store. The traffic was light as Spring Break seemed to have started early. There I found what I needed. I next headed to McMenamins for dinner. It was happy hour, and I ordered a Ruby and a happy hour cheeseburger. Susie and I did not have much money left when we first moved here in 1996 and would splurge on a burger and beer at McMenamins once a week. So I decided to remember that and blew my calorie count.

I brought my Apple laptop with me, but I did not write. I just ate and tried to relax. I have not had a cheeseburger in months, but it was excellent. The side salad with blue cheese dressing was also a treat.

Aside: Yes, I come from a family of people who deal with stress by eating.

I paid the check, more than it used to be in 1996, and boarded Air Volvo. On returning to the Volvo Cave, I stopped by Guardian Games (previously, Rainy Day Games). They were clearing old stock with up to 25% off. The board game Stroganoff (named for the family, not the dish) was at a reduced price. I had thought about buying it before–it has good reviews, and now it is reduced, so I had to get it. I spent the rest of the evening reading and punching the game. The game is a resource-gathering game with some worker placement and rewarded actions. Much simpler than many I play and without the deck building or complex player board that has become the de rigor of Kickstarter games (I learned it was a Kickstarter). It looks like it would play fast. I am glad to have it and look forward to playing.

The theme of Stroganoff is to gather furs on the Russian steps. These become the currency to buy other resources and to achieve awards. The deeper you travel, the more options you will likely have. In Winter, you return, gather your riches, and compose new songs. There are songs to purchase with your experiences that are recorded as song points. It looks like fun, and the strategies will be complex.

The game uses lots of cardboard, and I think it could have been upgraded to include more wood and real coins. There is also no player’s aid. All of this is likely available online (it is, and even a rules update). I did look up the upgraded version (with all the extras), which is over $100 plus shipping. I like my$50+ copy!

After reading that and punching the game, I showered and went to bed early. I soon was asleep, the coughing slowing from the cough suppressant. My allergies are still enjoying all the Spring pollen.

Thanks for reading.

Today, I mainly worked from home. So I rose at 6:30 with some reluctance, but the 7:30 status meeting meant I needed to be going sooner. The last meeting is at 5:45 PM, which is a large bracketing. I did cook dinner in that bracket and finished eating dinner for the previous meeting. I also rested a few times.

So my alarm went off after I sat up in bed. I turned it off, put on my slippers and robe, and found my home office. The sun rose, and it was dark again in the mornings after the time change; as the sun rose, I could see that the day would be gray, and we had Oregon mist but no rain to measure. It is always strange to have blue in the sky and Oregon mist, but here in the Pacific Northwest, we just smile and know we live in a unique, wonderful place with rainbows and sunny rain.

I did not have to rush, and soon, hours of Zoom meetings took most of the morning. I finally washed up and dressed. I had coffee, a banana, and then one toast with jam to take with my meds. It was beautiful–when you stop eating sweats, some jam was a treat.

Scott is at Swift at Nike WHQ, and I will drive to meet him for lunch. We have lunch on Thursdays. We talk about work while eating at the cafe. I have the pop-up: chicken and tiny dumplings with veggies and mashed potatoes. Scott has the salad bar. I have been reacting to salad, so I did not do my usual salad with Scott. It is always good to catch up with Scott.

They are remodeling our workspace until next week, so I head back to the Volvo Cave. I arrive there without any issues in Air Volvo. The traffic is light; I suspect some folks took an early local spring break.

I spoke to Matt V on the phone. Matt (or M@) will manage my estate should the need arise, and I updated him on my paperwork and planning. We also discussed gaming items as M@, and I have been playing Role Playing Games (RPG) for years. We used to alternate running (DM-ing in RPG speak) games. I am thinking about playing with more groups (M@ liked the idea), but he suggested using Dungeons and Dragons and not Savage World. He uses a simplified set of characters for new players. Interesting. More to come as I think about the future.

And I am so glad to be thinking about the future and not worrying about HAVING a future. F**king brain tumor. I look forward to many years of playing games with M@ and discussing gaming plans with him. He is an expert gamer, and I seek his thoughts and advice. Again, it is good to focus on future fun.

I return to working in my home office. During endless status meetings starting at 3ish, I carry the laptop to the kitchen and do the dishes while listening to the meetings. I then begin to cook dinner. I boil water for pasta, open a jar of pasta sauce, heat it in a pan, and brown some sweat Italian-style sausage in another pan. All of this happened while I attended three status and process meetings.

I wash the pasta in cold water to prevent it from cooking and sticking together, then put it in a large glass dish. I then add some ricotta cheese mixed with dried parsley in dollops to the pasta. I tear up some good mozzarella and put that between the dollops of ricotta. Meanwhile, I combined the sauce into the frying pan of browned sausage. Let that cook for a while. I reserved a cup of water for the pasta, and I mixed that into the sauce (the water was salted, and thus, starch and salt were added to the sauce–an improvement). I carefully pour the boiling sauce with sausage onto the pasta and cheese. I tear up more mozzarella and sprinkle with bread crumbs. I baked this for about an hour, adding hot water to the sides of the dish once to keep the pasta wet.

This is a revision of the same scratch-made sauce and cooking the pasta first recipe from the NY Times. I would say that the pasta was overcooked, and I should use uncooked pasta and add two cups of water next time. Still, it was good. Corwin liked it. I think the jar sauce was a good upgrade. More to come.

I took out all the trash and recycling that had piled up in the house. I was happy to get it out of the house and into the container, and I was glad to see that it was gone on Friday morning. Just more chores that need to be done.

At 7AM, I took a nap after eating all that pasta (which was not good for me–but it was sooooo good); I rose for Theology Pub on Zoom tonight. Today’s topic was justice and avoiding unintended consequences when seeking justice. We had seven of us on Zoom, and we talked about many things and some early Christian Father’s writing on the sources of evil. I got to quote the pagan Hesiod on justice, how the world was created by Zeus (in his story), and what he intended for us of the Iron Age. I will be loaning out my translation of Hesiod. We concluded that justice is found in the community. Jesus was building communities and churches–it is about us together.

We finished around 9, and we all enjoyed that chat. We ended the Zoom meeting. I then started on the blog. I am feeling a bit better about the future and the surgery. Meeting with friends and talking about God and justice seemed to help.

Thanks for reading!

I am tired today, and it seems like a hard day. I had to work on a few items for Susie’s concert. Tears came and went. I also rested briefly and was fast asleep in minutes to wake up too late for a meeting, but they did not need me, so it worked out. I decided to take next week off as the project is shutting down next week for local Spring Break. I was planning to hoard my time off, but it will be a wasted week, and I just can’t do a find-work week.

I woke just before my alarm at 6:25. I was up late the night before writing the blog, and the day before that, I was traveling from NYC. Self-inflicted.

With Susie’s Concert coming this weekend, I see the approach of my surgery, and to be frank, I am scared, and I am having trouble accepting the suffering I face. Brain tumors–f**k. It makes the days harder, the dread.

The air is full of pollen again, and I am choking and coughing all day. This, too, wears on me. I am working from home as I have items coming up for the concert and a package to pick up.

After the initial status meetings, starting at 7:30AM now, I cleaned up and dressed. I boarded Air Volvo and headed to the post office. It was a short wait there to get a large box. When I opened it at home, it was full of packing peanuts, with the expensive books carefully wrapped and stored in the middle of the packing: Leonardo Da Vinci: The Madrid Codex Facsimile Edition. A birthday present for myself. This version comes with an Italian and English translation. I am happy to have a copy of the master’s work. After carefully unpacking, I looked through the books to ensure they were intact and worth the investment. They were excellent. I put the set in my office.

The meetings continued. I cooked chicken for some dinner in the future. I boiled the chicken thighs (boneless and skinless), baked them, and then boiled them with North African spices. They are quite good. I put them in zip-lock bags and will likely have chicken for a few days. While that was cooked, I ate a leftover pasta dish I made a few days ago. It was improved with time.

I did a few more work meetings and then rested, and as I said, I slept by accident. My day ended, and I soon headed out with some laptops, sticks, and games. I showed the pictures and Susie’s ice skating video to Z and Dondrea. They think they will be great.

Z and I played the board game The Lost Ruins of Arnak again. Z was tired and did not remember how to play, but Z soon found the way. Z could have won had Z followed up at the end, but next time, I am sure it will be hard for me to win. Andrew joined us when band practice started. I like the game with three players, and Andrew, who is new to the game, liked the mix of theme, complexity, and deck building with resource management. We played the base version with all the corrections and additional cards. I picked the basic easy game, which worked out for the best.

The Lost Ruins of Arnak is a favorite, and I like the theme of the Hollywood version of archeology in South America. The deck-building game mechanic is also a favorite; combining it with a strong theme and resource management makes it fit my favorite type of game. Another favorite is Concordia, which fits this model, too.

Z was happy to be playing games again. I was happy for the distraction.

I headed home after that, had some toast, and wrote this blog. Thanks for reading. I am falling asleep while writing, so please forgive my mistakes.

I have been working on Susie’s photos most of the night. I did slip out with Corwin to get some Mexican food, but I have been building a photo album in Mac Photo for most of the night. I have got Barb’s (Susie’s sister) photos combined with what I scanned and all the photos I have of Susie from the years on my Mac. I included the last photo I have of Susie on 13 Oct 2024, when she passed. All this is loaded on a stick. I did cry a few times as I watched it as a slide show. I also got Susie’s movie of her skating running on my laptop and found a cable to put that on a large screen. That, too, is on a stick. Ready as I can be.

I am tired now. I will try to write a blog for today. It will be short.

I talked to Dondrea and Bill at the church about some of the items for the service. Bill will do the usual punch, and Dondrea will help me get the audio and video working. They will have the mics for us on Saturday.

I also cooked a corned beef for Corwin while he worked out. After boiling it for a few hours, I just put it in the oven. Dondrea slowly bakes corned beef in beer. I boil and then bake. I then use the boiled water to cook the veggies. We have Brussels sprouts instead of cabbage to go with carrots and a few potatoes plus an onion to add some flavor.

This should be ready about 11PM when Corwin usually gets in from the gym.

Corwin starts his new job as an Uber food delivery driver. He has his truck and a license, so let’s all pray this works out. It would be wonderful if he could make a good wage as an Uber food delivery driver.

I returned home early and discovered that I had missed my birthday present. Every year, I buy something extravagant for myself for my birthday. This year, I selected a used copy of the six-volume reproduction of The Madrid Codices of Leonardo Da Vinci. I did not know it was coming today, and it required a signature and my ID to accept it. I will head to the post office to get it on Wednesday. My copy is translated into English and Italian.

Sorry, I am just bouncing around writing tonight. My emotions are messy, and I am tired and cold. Among the photos, I saw my friend’s daughter, who just passed away. It is hard to see so many folks gone.

Here is Susie on a Vagas trip.

Work was the usual meeting, with a few approvals and change control items. It was a sunny day, and last night’s winds had blown the bad air out of the valley. My coughing was much reduced. It was 70F and sunny in the afternoon. Not our usual endless rain!

I was working in the atrium, and folks stopped by, including many directors, to chat about various work and non-work items. Everyone seemed happy today, and I felt they were happy that I was back from NYC. They also know Susie’s Concert is Saturday, and I believe they were trying to help.

I will put the sticks, DVI cables, a spare Windows laptop, and my Apple M2 in Air Volvo for Wednesday. I will also play some board games with Z. We have not played for a while. Maybe Scythe again or Concordia, which are all my favorites. I also thought we might try Savage Worlds for a role-playing game one of these weeks. SW is sort of Dungeons and Dragons light, and it would be fun to try it. So maybe soon. Also, the printed rules are cheap, and PDFs of the rules are even cheaper.

In the mail, I received another set of add-ons for my model of the SMS Deffflinger, a WW1 battlecruiser–considered the greatest one made for the time period. I have bought the same set twice, as the model is the deluxe version with the same add-ons. At least I have the spare parts to make mistakes. I am unsure when I will get to this, but I am excited to try.

Well, it is nearly midnight. The corned beef and veggies were great–I had a sample. I need to stop, shower, and sleep. Thanks for reading.