Author: alohawild

March started here with gray clouds and light rain, a damp lamb start for March (the belief is that March begins as either a lamb or a lion). I also managed some sleep, so it was a later start. As often happens, the morning disappeared while I wrote the blog, took my pills, and read my email and some news. The videos of missiles hitting and killing people in Kyiv, Ukraine, are hard to watch.

I open a can of Michigan Vegetarian Chilli and have that for lunch. Pretty much tasteless bean-only chili. This was some of the food sent from the church, and I am trying to eat it as it was given to help people. The second can of chili might need some work next time.

I dress and am ready to use Air Volvo in the early afternoon. The traffic is higher and more complex to Forest Grove–the pandemic lockdowns are ending. I can see the lines for coffee and at fast food are long. I stop at a McDonald’s to get a chocolate shake to make up for the lack of taste in lunch. And Chocolate is always good. I am still suffering from extreme cold sensitivity, which makes the shake hard to drink–My throat feels like it burns a bit. But, it is so good.

Without issue, I managed the entry rituals at Forest Grove Rehab and Care Center at 3900 Pacific Highway. I find Susie is still in her room, 44A, and I just missed her in a wheelchair. Susie’s best roommate so far, Terry, is headed home this weekend for homecare. We are happy to see Terry get better, but we will miss her as she has helped Susie stay calm.

Susie is happy to see me, but she is trying to speak about various things, which is not understandable. Susie has not backtracked but instead is trying to get out whole thoughts. I try to understand.

Susie’s Aunt Joyce in North Carolina sent a stuffed animal for Mardi Gras. Susie was talking to the bear the whole time. This put a smile on her face, and she named the bear, of course, Mardi Gras.

The cleaner shrimp in the aquarium at the facility is gone. I told the head of the facility that many shrimp disappear during Mardi Gras, and they should not be surprised. That got a smile.

Susie chatted with her mother, Leta, on my iPhone using FaceTime. Unfortunately, I still can tire quickly and leave before I get too comfortable, and Susie has to wake me up!

Susie was still talking to the bear when I left.

On the way home, a pickup truck driver decided to run a red light as fast as possible. I had stopped for the light with some abruptness as it did seem to change unexpectedly, but I decided to not experiment with the law, physics, and possible paint removal from Air Volvo. The pickup driver went another way and survived the experiment.

I tried to call Corwin, but he missed my call and ended up walking home with the rain only restarting as he reached Clarion Street. I asked him should we get some sausage and shrimp (not that one in the tank–I did not take it) to make something for the end of Mardi Gras or head out. He votes for dinner out. I also contact Mariah, and we agree to meet at BJ’s for dinner (they make an excellent Jambalaya).

I lay down to read and nearly sleep past our meeting time. Mariah has a table for us in the bar. I order noodles as I am not sure I can handle the whole bowl of Jambalaya. I do a chocolate dessert and share it with Mariah. I am quiet most of the discussion at dinner.

I missed the President’s State of the Union message. I heard it was not terrible.

My energy levels are low, and I find it a bit hard to accept not getting anything done but lying around and reading. I would like to write and build something. It is hard to not work anything but the minimal. I know this will pass soon, but that does not make me feel better now. I am also a bit upset that I missed a dose of my meds and have to extend my chemotherapy one 1/2 day. I am a bit worried that I have gone stupid. Mariah reassures me that I am not missing any IQ points.

I get a note from Kickstarter that the H.P. Lovecraft Film Festival in Portland will be again this October. I plan to be there and write an entry to the 500-word horror story contest. I won last year.

I decided what I need is Brain Cookies. So I order the whole series of Old Man’s War books by John Scalzi on my Kindle and start with number one. I liked the other series, and it is vastly cheaper to just order it all on my Kindle in one purchase. I can hardly put it down, it is better than a Brain Cookie, and I finally sleep near 2ish. I had to get up and take my inhaler, which kept me up. I should have taken it at 10PM with my pills. Next time!

Here is my winning story, 498 words, from 2021:

“Istanbul” By Michael R Wild, alohawild@mac.com

The map is old, German, and shows every building in 1926 Constantinople. A book on the map opens to a faded page. The cover is loose, and the pages are falling from the book, a diary from great granddad Alfred describing his life as a tourist back in 1926 in what we now call Istanbul. A clip of hair from my late granddad’s head. It was gruesome work to slip into the cemetery and raid his corpse. At least the smell was gone after so many years, and the coffin had resisted the weight of the earth for years. It was unusually reinforced. I will have to remember that detail. There is an incense odor of myrrh and other exotic items I found in ingredients of exotic tea blends on the Internet. A candle is burning made of wax created from the fat harvest from the corpse of a murderer and an even more unpleasant raid on a graveyard, mixed with mummy dust. A new use for a microplane kitchen tool, I think. I remember slipping into a Curiosity Show in Niagara Falls. There a mummy is a lost pharaoh in deplorable condition. It was not improved by me breaking into the case and using the microplane.   

My life was changed when Alfred died, and he sent me his diary and various other items. Using his notes, journal, potions, and arcane instruments, I became an Adept of the Weird. Soon I was learning terrible truths and summoning horrors that no law of our human science could explain. I stole, killed, and took what I would. I spoke incantations that would kill most men or women just to hear the words, let alone see what vista I opened—worlds and universes of burning chaos and power. Then, I harvested the power and used it as I wished, returning whole planes to quantum foam.

Now I can hear the hounds. They are following through the cracks and blasts and destruction I have wrought. They feast on the souls of Adepts who tread too heavily in the weird realms. The light in the room is the same, but somehow the dark is more. I turn to the words on the faded page. I ignore the corners in the room-filling with night. It is time to loop my soul.

I study the map, then look into the flame and breath in the incense, and imagine Constantinople of 1926 while chanting the words of power. I imagine standing on the bridge over the Golden Horn. I see myself there as Alfred. On the bridge is the tollman, and I reach into my pocket as Alfred and pay him to cross. I can taste the sea air and feel the warmth. The smell hints that the spice market is not far.

I am Alfred. The hounds have by now taken my body in my time. I have looped back. I am safe. I have great works to do.

The day started with me up about 8:30 and getting only a few hours of sleep. I was still having trouble sleeping and had to take my inhaler to feel like I could breathe. The pain in my right hand also requires painkillers; the cane use bruised my hand. I will have to be more careful next cycle.

I managed to get going early and was feeling better. So I wrote a blog after reading my email, read the war news, and caught up on the posts from Internet folks I follow (Violet Blue and Sexy Cyborg).

Pills were taken on time, but the pill count shows that I missed a dose in the last couple of days. So I will be more careful. The missed dose just gets added to the end. All that lack of sleep has really messed me up.

On less essential items, the earthquake insurance bill came. It is $547 a year to protect the house with the limited coverage that is available. It will still cost me, after insurance, over $50,000 to rebuild should the Volvo Cave be destroyed by an earthquake. The insurance is through the company created after the insurance companies took huge losses on the last big one in California, GeoVera. This is in addition to my usual insurance.

The house is from 1978, and the house is not bolted to the foundation using the earthquake-resistant process. The corners of the house are not reinforced for an earthquake. The foundation is poured cement without rebar reinforcement. These are all later building code changes. Thus, the big one may take down the house. But, the framing and wooden floor are solid for 1978, and the house is only one story, so it also might survive a significant shaking with minor damage. The house has already been hit by a falling tree and survived three more minor earthquakes.

I have paid for “make-it-code” coverage should the house be damaged and need not only to be repaired but partially rebuilt to code. This is covered in the regular insurance from Allstate, and I would recommend anyone living the 1970s house lifestyle to have this coverage.

I have chicken noodle soup for lunch and then see Susie.

Without incident, I reach the Forest Grove Rehab and Care Center at 3900 Pacific Highway, Room 44A. Susie is back in bed as I just missed lunch. Susie was looking tired.

I called Susan’s mother, and Susie and Leta chatted on FaceTime. I also interrupted Susan’s sister, Barb, dog park experience. Barb and Susie chatted for a bit; we could hear all the barking in the background.

Susie reads the card that Leta sent.

I stepped out of the room as Susie’s roommate needed some privacy. I sat in the lobby and watched the fish. I then stood up and was dizzy and saw stars. Anemia is back, and I need to be more careful. I am suddenly tired and dizzy. Time to go home. I kiss Susie goodbye. I chat with the nurse, Nichelle, so they know I am having this issue.

I was OK to drive and headed back to Beaverton. I stop by the gaming store, ten minutes or less from the house, chat with the staff, and pick up a game organizer for the board game Root. This is a favorite game, but it is one of my hardest to get on the table. Every player has a different game to play in Root, and the Law of Root rules combine all of the play into a workable framework. Thus, it is hard to learn, and I think nearly impossible to teach. You have to learn the game by playing, but each faction is a different game; thus, to master this game, you have to learn six other games! I have everything in bags in the now three boxes that make up the expanded game (plus a roll-up matt to replace the board for that premium experience). I think the game organizer would reduce the set-up time. The Cats are the basic game, and a new player can enjoy the Cats. I often play them and get beaten back as other factions suddenly start winning.

I am now drained and not feeling well. I spend the rest of the day reading and trying to not throw up. However, I still order dinner and eat it. Gary Mooney and Michelle Vondenkamp and SEC provided GrubHub cards for dinner; thanks!. I watch, as usual, the news while eating, PBS news.

I spend an exciting evening, not really, reading and not getting ill. However, I managed to sleep the night and catch up on sleep.

 

I was up early as I had some breathing issues. I got my inhaler and was better in about twenty minutes. Unfortunately, I am back to getting only about five hours of sleep a night. My hand is also painful. The joints are sore on the right hand, and more ibuprofen helps.

I collected all my clothing, stuffed them into the washing machine, and did laundry.

I watched the church service at 10:30. Before that, I had breakfast and took my 10AM pills. While listening to the church service, I wrote the blog, a typical multi-tasking for me.

Susie surprised me by calling me at home. I attended the 1:30 church group to discuss the sermon and share our thoughts and our cares. The nurses had helped Susie reach me, and Susie was concerned that I was not well enough to see her. I reassured her that Corwin and I would visit her soon.

I also went online and took some financial actions to cover all my expenses and pay the twenty-six thousand bill to cover Susie’s care until April. I then wrote out the check and made a copy of the bill; my printer is an all-in-one HP and can do copies (I pay a monthly fee for ink sent to me from HP) and put it all in an envelope.

It was raining, and the drive was slow and safe. I drove Air Volvo to the Forest Grove Rehab and Care Center at 3900 Pacific Highway, and we soon were in Room 44A.

Susie was a bit out-of-sorts but happy to see Corwin. I stepped out to let Corwin and Susie chat. I delivered the payment to biz office and feel so glad that there are no doubts of Susie remaining safe in Forest Grove while I finish my chemotherapy.

I connected Susie with her mother, Leta, for a FaceTime call. They chatted for a while. Then, as I did not want to drive in the dark with the ranging rains and wind, we headed out about 4PM. It is always hard to leave, but I try to make it there every day.

Corwin and I stopped by Carl’s Jr. for fav burgers. We get back home as the rain and winds increase. The rain is heavy all night. I lay down and blink; it is after 8PM. Corwin makes an excellent Blue Apron spice meatloaf, a late second dinner.

I continue to read and take my 10PM pills, but sleep is hard to find as I had slept the afternoon to evening. I finally slept about 1ish.

I thank you for reading. As you imagine, I leave out some items. For example, I usually cry at least once a day. Mostly, the sadness is about Susie and her condition. The pain, the fatigue, and the side effects of chemotherapy are just a journey and do not hit my emotions. But, as I go forward with the chemotherapy, my feelings are closer to the surface. Thus, I cry most mornings as at that time I have yet to face the day, and the realization of what I have to do that day can be crushing. But then I make coffee, read email, and start the next day of the journey.

Sleep did not really come as I was not tired at night. So I was up early watching the war and getting going slow. I had toast for breakfast and toast again when it was time to take my pills, always at 10.

The rains are back, and from what I read, there is a category 4 rain river coming that will drop six inches or more rain on us here in the Volvo Cave. It is so lovely to have our weather return to its regular pattern. The sunny days were getting to us.

Christine Moay sent me a note that she wanted to deliver a meal. It was a wonderful dinner!

I made mac & cheese for lunch from the food box sent from my church, First United Methodist, Beaverton.

After lunch, Air Volvo and I headed out to Forest Grove Rehab and Care Center at 3900 Pacific Highway, Room 44a. The trip was wet, and the Oregonians were not experimenting with new driving techniques in the rain. We were all going a bit slow, but it felt like everyone was happy to be in the rain again.

No sleep was not improving my driving, and I was extra careful and managed to get to the facility without any events or enjoying the auto controls from Air Volvo.

I was admitted after the usual rituals. Accounts Payable is no longer closed to Covid, and they were able to get me, finally, my bill. We are on self-pay as no insurance will cover long-term care unless you have purchased that or are an executive at a company, and it is included in your platinum health care plan. Thus it costs about $12,000 a month to keep Susie comfortable in Forest Grove. I am pleased to pay this (I sold stock on a good day in mid-2021 when I was stranded in New York City) and keep Susie safe while I complete my chemotherapy. The money I use is retirement money, and thus I feel OK to use it as planned.

Aside: I include this information, not as a political statement, but to cover my experience and the truth of what I have to do. Americans who are sick and need to be in a facility should expect to pay $12,000 a month in the Pacific Northwest. This is not covered by Medicare. It is not covered by Obama Care. There are cheaper care options, but it will still be a lot of money.

Besides getting the bill, I spent a short time with Susie. I hate to fall asleep in front of her. As you can imagine, it really upsets Susie when she shakes me awake to make sure I am OK. So I have to keep the visit short once the chair seems very comfortable. Susie was able to chat with her mother, Leta, on FaceTime.

Susie received a prayer shaw from Rev. Stephen Wolff and his congregation. Corwin was overly enthusiastic about recycling, so I have lost the church’s name. Thank you!

I left and headed for a long drive to Cornell Farms, almost to Portland, and the polite trolly car sounded when the automatic braking took over when Air Volvo detected that the vehicles in front of me were not really moving. No events but just a reminder that Air Volvo is always watching.

The extreme cold sensitivity is still in my hands and feet, but the general problem with the cold is gone. I can go outside with a mask to keep my breath warm. The gloves must be on. I wanted to walk around the nursery to look at the roses and other plants. I needed to pick up some special naturally infected root stuff for the roses coming soon.

I walked along the rows and rows of roses and looked for anything special. Cornell Farms usually sticks to what sells and leaves the special roses for others to sell. I did not find anything I would want, but they have some older David Austin roses for those folks looking for a great flower.

I bought some starter sets. I have some pansies seeds I might have to start.

I drove Air Volvo home without any more stops. I was not quite feeling well.

Soon more side-effects happen. I needed to take some meds to reduce the impact. It was unhappy to be running to the restroom, but this side-effect had not yet happened in Cycle 2. Bingo! I got them all.

Thus I was reading and waiting for the side-effect to calm down. Dinner was delivered and enjoyed.

At about 11PM, Corwin and I set up the board game Vindication. I wanted to play and needed to wait until I was better before falling asleep. This board game was designed by folks in Washington state just across the Columbia River. It is a favorite for Corwin and proved that he remembered how to play by beating me. I just could not get the right combination of effects and locations to work for me. Still, it is a beautiful game, and we both enjoyed getting this game out.

I went to rest a bit and fell asleep. I did not really awaken until the morning.

 

Going backward, I reached home about midnight, took my pills, and then chatted with Corwin about the perfect Batman Movie. We are both afraid that the newest one will not be even close to good. I had taken my pills a few hours later as I had meant to meet David and Michelle Smith to see the new movie Death on the Nile. Unfortunately, I drove to the wrong theater and missed them completely. A stupid mistake.

I was supposed to meet the Smiths to see the movie I have waited for, Death on the Nile, they went home, and I was nearly alone in a theater at Progress Ridge with popcorn, chocolates (you can’t watch Hercules without chocolate), and coffee. I have seen this story in the BBC PBS version (I have the David Suchet version) many times and have read the book. This new more Hollywood version was excellent and more focused than the PBS version that closely follows the book. The dropping and combining of some characters that were the usual red herrings I thought an improvement. What is so appealing about this Agatha Christie story is that you have the same clues as the great detective. You feel the great detective’s anguish as the guest starts dying when he cannot solve it, at first. The addition of jazz and the replacement of one of the sub-stories makes for a surprise for those like me who know the book and the PBS version. I would recommend the movie, brutal and full of unsympathetic characters, but be prepared, if you are a lover of Agatha Christe’s text, as Hollywood has revised much.

Before the movie, I was feeling better and reading The Consuming Fire. This is the second book in a Space Opera set of three books. I like the characters in the book and have read it before. It makes a good break. I do not sleep. I have not slept for about 24 hours and I remember having this problem before. I will head back to a nursery today (Saturday) and walk some.

Before this, I met Mariah at the Grand Lodge in Forest Grove. I have hot tea with a dessert and help her eat the tater tots before I have dessert for dinner. I had a Carl’s Jr. Western Burger for lunch, so bad and yet so good, and was not ready for an early dinner. We chatted about the stock market and investment planning. Mariah is still trying to buy a house, but if that becomes impossible because the current housing market is just insane, then other ideas such as investing may be another plan.

Earlier, I was with Susie at the Forest Grove Rehab and Care Center at 3900 Pacific Highway, Room 44A. Susie was a bit tired but managed to chat with her mother, Leta, on FaceTime. We then did some sing-along rock videos. This is my singing therapy for Susie. Lastly, we did YMCA with arm movements. Susie was able to keep up this time.

I spoke to Susie’s head nurse, Pre, and she is suggesting that they will start to work with Susie as she is getting better, a surprise to everyone. Susie is officially in hospice so she cannot get rehab, but Pre is prepared to slip in a bit of rehab from her nurses. A good day.

Before seeing Susie actually do some of the YMCA moves, I had to get Air Volvo through the congested-before-Covid-19 traffic I found in Hillsboro. A group of cars had wrecked in the 30 MPH three-lane road (eye roll). Car parts everywhere. It looked so pre-Covid. Again, the driving around the accident involved overly polite Oregonians just all sitting and looking at each other. Air Volvo leads the pack out of the accident, of course.

I spoke to Dan Gray that day. He is the Trustee for the church and apparently, we had a very basic issue. The old safe was locked and the thieves had taken all the keys. The combination was unknown. The lost keys included the key for the safe–the key is the backup in case the battery dies and/or the combination is unusable. Thus Dan bought a replacement safe online that matched the current one, I had purchased it years ago, took a saws-all to the old safe, and installed the replacement. Some solutions are simple.

I forgot to take a pic on Friday.

I started at 4:30 with no sleep. I wrote the blog and prepared to start the day. The chemo pill bottle is slowly emptying.